The Tomorrow Times

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Company Spends $14 Million on New Logo, Unveils Slightly Different Shade of Beige Private Equity Firm Acquires Beloved Family Diner, Immediately Identifies Grandma as “Key Cost Center” Developer Admits “Bug Fixes and Performance Improvements” Is a Template He Wrote in 2016 and Never Changed Customer Service Line Experiencing Higher Than Normal Call Volume for 17th Consecutive Year Man Crosses One Item Off Wife’s To-Do List, Three New Items Grow in Its Place Old Man Reads Obituaries First Every Morning to Make Sure He Isn't In Them Pigs Can't Afford Straw, Sticks, or Bricks, Settle for "Starter Home" That Is a Cardboard Box Listed at $389,000, Wolf Eats All Three